How do I . . . ?
Frequently asked questions about the meeting - with brief responses.*
We are pleased that you have continued to worship with us and now have questions relating the life of this meeting. Below are some commonly asked questions from both new and experienced attenders. If the answers are not sufficient for your needs, please contact a member of the Ministry and Counsel Committee.
How can I become more deeply centered during worship?
o Come to worship with “heart and mind prepared” through devotional reading, prayer or meditation.
o If socializing prior to worship is part of your centering be careful to arrive in good time to allow for that. Be mindful of other’s needs to enter into worship quietly.
o Gladly join the presence of worshippers, as you gathering together as a single body to experience God/Spirit/Divine presence.
o As you settle into worship, gently let go of distractions and open yourself to the workings of the Spirit.
o Honor the message with a period of worshipful silence before another message is offered so that all may have an opportunity to receive messages in their fullness.
o Strive to listen to messages with an open, listening heart. The speaker may use faith language that doesn’t correspond to your faith language, but the message is given as it was received from a Divine Source. Listen beyond, behind and beneath the words to the gain the sense of the Spirit. The message may not speak to your condition at the time, but it surely will speak to another’s condition.
How do I know when to speak during worship?
Each of us seeks to communicate directly with God and to feel the Divine Presence in our midst. Consider the following as you feel led to speak:
o Take a moment to test that leading – is it a “motion” of Divine source or a “notion” from your thinking? If a notion, perhaps you need to wait.
o Test whether the message is one for those gathered, or for yourself? If for yourself, perhaps it needs more “seasoning”.
o Test whether you are responding to an earlier message. A more appropriate time to respond or engage in dialogue would be after the rise of worship and in the spirit of Love.
o Test whether the message might be taken as a political statement, lecture or personal announcement. Such messages are rarely grounded in the Spirit.
o If after all this testing, the message still needs to be given at this time, then rise and speak loudly and clearly so that all may hear what you have been given to speak. Do not concern yourself with eloquence or finely organized sentences; leave room for Divine Working through others who are present.
How do I participate in the monthly meetings for worship with attention to business?
o Attend! All are welcome and encouraged to participate, whether a member of the meeting or an attender/seeker.
o Be aware that all present share responsibility for the right order of conducting the business of the meeting as it seeks to discern how God would have them proceed with the agenda items.
o Come with mind and heart open to the working of the Spirit; set aside personal and political interests and be prepared to have your mind changed.
o Come prepared and informed about items under consideration.
o Maintain a worshipful presence.
o Listen carefully and with respect to others.
o Wait to be recognized before speaking (a raised hand will give indication of your leading to speak).
o When led to speak, do so briefly and to the point, without repetition.
o Trust that committees have carefully done their work and that it has been seasoned in worship.
o Strive to work towards unity when differences are present.
o Seek to understand what constitutes the “sense of the meeting.”
How do I request membership in the meeting?
When you are clear that you desire to be a member of this meeting, please write a letter to the clerk of the meeting or Ministry and Counsel Committee stating your desire. Include information about how you came to this decision. A clearness committee will be appointed to ensure that there are no barriers to membership. Together you and the clearness committee will discern and clarify what membership means to you and to the meeting.
How do I request a clearness committee, let the meeting know that I have a personal need, a financial need or a concern of a social action nature?
Various needs can be met by several of the meeting’s standing committees. Needs of a spiritual or family/personal nature would usually be considered by Ministry and Counsel. Depending on the nature of the financial need (e.g. scholarship support or emergency needs), either Ministry and Counsel or Finance Committee would consider the request. Peace and Social Concerns would consider requests for clearness on social/political matters. Or speak to the clerk about making an announcement at the rise of worship.
The general process:
o Contact the clerk of Ministry and Counsel, preferably in writing of your need. If it is an emergency, do not hesitate to make personal contact. Your need will be considered at the next committee meeting and the appropriate committee will be asked to form a clearness committee to meet with you. Please know that finding compatible times for all committee members can be slow, but know that your need has not been forgotten.
o Ask for the guidelines for applying for financial assistance for scholarship or emergency funds from the clerk of the meeting or Finance Committee.
How do I contribute to the life of the meeting through committee work?
Our Nominating Committee seeks guidance of Spirit in pairing the needs of the meeting with the gifts and leadings of members and attenders. You may be asked if you are led to serve in a position or on a committee by Nominating. Out of this work, the meeting appoints Friends to serve on the various committees that season the work of the meeting. (See the Gifts and Leadings pamphlet for descriptions of positions of responsibility and committees). If you find you feel called to a particular committee’s work or understand you have the gifts needed to carry out the work of any committee, please contact the clerk of Ministry and Counsel, which facilitates the nominating process. You need not wait until the beginning of a new year to begin service on a committee, but do seek counsel as to the needs of the committee and your leading.
How do I contribute financially to the meeting?
We receive contributions in the form of checks or cash. Contributions can be left in the designated box. If you will need a receipt for tax purposes please indicate from whom cash donations come.
“In kind” gifts are credited when a receipt for the gift is submitted to the Treasurer. In kind gifts might be the donation of supplies, copying, etc.
How do I request marriage/holy union/commitment ceremony under the care of the meeting?
Send a letter of request to the clerk of Ministry and Counsel. A clearness committee will be appointed to meet with the couple to ensure there are no barriers to the union taking place under the care of the meeting. Clearness may not be reached in one meeting and it is wise to allow several months for the process to receive due consideration.
How do I arrange for a memorial meeting?
Whether or not you have completed a form outlining your preferences for burial and other end of life issues, a request can be submitted to Ministry and Counsel Committee. The amount of participation and support asked of the meeting is a mutual agreement between you and the meeting and family members if desired.
—Ministry and Counsel Committee, December 2005
*We are grateful to the work and publications of the monthly meetings of
Madison, WI and Lancaster, PA that served as models for the development of this pamphlet.